May His Wiener Fall Off

car-window-broken-290x217Last night my wife was a victim of a smash & grab – her car window was broken and her purse (read: portable office) got ripped off.

Lakewood Police were at our door immediately, and we went through the perfunctory steps. They asked if we wanted to prosecute if the perps were apprehended, because most people just want their stuff back. Umm… yes, please!

But we’re realistic enough to suppose that it is unlikely they will be caught, and that we have seen the last of her purse. My sister – another VOC a few years ago – said all she could do was something I can get behind: an imprecatory prayer.

Not really a curse – okay, it’s really a curse – my sister wished that the stolen goods, when it happened to her, would burn in the hands of the thieves and that they would get no pleasure out of their ill-gotten gains.

My sister had much more compassionate wishes for her thieves. Me? I want body parts, and specific organs, to dry up and fall off.

Is that so wrong?!?

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One thought on “May His Wiener Fall Off

  1. But you won’t see it when it happens. Take a little of the joy of the said body part drying up and falling off. Don’tcha think?

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